Whiskey Bits

"RE-RELEASE: Coffee; Bigfoot"

• Matt Sommerfield & Phil Stokes • Season 1

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This episode was originally released on 7/30/2024.

Join us as we embark on an invigorating journey through the captivating world of coffee, shedding light on everything from brewing techniques to rich lore that shapes our favorite drinks. The latest episode of Whiskey Bits delves into the heart of coffee culture, where every sip reveals a story waiting to be told. Whether you're a long-time enthusiast or just starting your journey, the episode is packed with delightful insights and humor that will resonate with anyone who enjoys a good cup.  

We explore the fascinating techniques behind creating the perfect brew, highlighting the use of an AeroPress and the science of brewing at the right temperature. But the conversation doesn’t stop there. We dig into the unexpected connection between coffee and bourbon, only to find that the myths surrounding "bourbon coffee" are much more complex than they seem. With laughter, we muse over the phenomenon of "monkey poop coffee," unveiling the quirky side of coffee that often goes unspoken.  

Get ready to redefine your morning routine as we challenge the notions of what makes a coffee experience worthwhile. By the end, you'll have a newfound appreciation for your next cup and perhaps a smile at the unexpected moments we shared. Tune in, sip your favorite brew, and join us in the conversation — we'd love to hear about your own coffee adventures! Don't forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review to support our show!

#WhiskeyBitsPodcast! #CoffeeCulture #BrewBetter #AeroPress #BourbonCoffee #CoffeeLovers #MonkeyPoopCoffee #CoffeeTime #CaffeineFix #CoffeeHumor #PodcastLife #WhiskeyAndCoffee

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Speaker 1:

Hi Matt.

Speaker 2:

What's up, phil? You see what we have here. J-balls, it's your one Damn.

Speaker 3:

I used it up right at the beginning. Yeah, you used it way too early. J-b yeah, jared, this is going to be in the back of your brain the whole time. I'm regretting it Just one more you know what I'll give you one more.

Speaker 2:

Yes, alright, I'll save it for later. One more that sounds great. Yeah, Listeners, this is the Jared that you may have heard of in previous episodes. He is our good friend and coffee lover. He is one of the most well-read and smartest people I know.

Speaker 1:

He also is good at reading. He's also good at reading. They go together. Yeah To be, well-read.

Speaker 2:

It helps if you can read. Yeah, thank you for explaining it, matt, you're welcome.

Speaker 1:

Next time on Whiskey Bits, the first step to being well-read. Can you read? Can you read? That's right, if you can read, you can be well-read. Okay, I'm learning a lot already, that's awesome. That's good. Welcome to Whiskey Bits with.

Speaker 2:

Matt and Phil, where we talk all things whiskey and all things comedy. This is a special episode because you love coffee in the way that we love bourbon. Yeah, so we wanted to have you on to talk to you about some of the amazing coffee techniques that we just witnessed. You can walk us through. It's good.

Speaker 1:

It was like watching a rocket liftoff. You know, was that not a good analogy? No, it was kind of the opposite of a rocket lift off. You know, was that not a good analogy? No, it was kind of the opposite of a rocket.

Speaker 2:

Okay, that's right, in fact it takes pushing down. Oh, that's yeah, it's okay. There was physics, but it was reverse propulsion yeah, that's funny, yeah, it's okay but you brought this coffee.

Speaker 1:

What is this? I brought this coffee for a reason.

Speaker 3:

You said I brought it for a reason except it was the wrong reason. So I I thought it would work really well, because you guys love bourbon, right Like I love coffee. Yes, hopefully not to the place of like. I drink it at work a lot, so hopefully that's not happening.

Speaker 1:

No, yeah, it's the exact. Yeah, same thing, same exact. That explains some things. Yep, yep.

Speaker 3:

That's why Phil's golf game is just horrible. I thought it was work because Colombia. So I was like dude, this is like it's aged in a bourbon barrel, which is a thing. And I think like a month or two ago I even sent a text to you guys saying like you should try this out, yeah, but I kind of direct you the wrong way because it's not actually aged in a bourbon barrel, jared, which I think Phil and his kindness realized that because he's like it's good, but I could tell that there's something there he knew, but he was just too nice to me wait.

Speaker 1:

It's good he drank it already tonight. No, this was like two months ago. You drank it two months ago. Yeah, I have been waiting. You have not. I bought three bags and have waited no, there's my bag.

Speaker 3:

I made jared bring his gas and I did everything.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, that's about right, yep that captures our relationship for the last 20 years. Can I borrow some coffee?

Speaker 3:

from you. I have three bags of coffee. So and I was telling the guys before we started to roll here is that this actually is called bourbon because it comes from an area in Ethiopia called Bourbon, Ethiopia.

Speaker 1:

What.

Speaker 3:

And then it somehow made its way over to Colombia, and they don't know how, in the last couple of years. They're confused. They are confused and I'm like who are these people?

Speaker 1:

that that's their job yeah.

Speaker 3:

But they don't know how it got there, but it's doing super well, and the fruit of the berry is pink, and so it's pink bourbon, okay, has zero to do with it. But the thing that the reason it worked is that it made it so that we didn't have to do this at night time and during the morning, like it's morning time this is the only way we can make it work, because it somehow had a connection to bourbon, even though it really didn't.

Speaker 1:

I thought you were like making coffee from staying up late.

Speaker 3:

Oh yeah which is you go to bed at jared's in bed.

Speaker 1:

What like an hour.

Speaker 3:

It's nine o'clock I already got an hour. It's Yep, I'm already getting close, yeah, so this is actually pretty late for me to be drinking coffee, so Normally it's at 4 am, it's true.

Speaker 1:

Is it really 4 am?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's my first cup is in the 4 o'clock hour. Oh my gosh. Yeah should we? So it's pink. The berries are pink before they get. Yeah, isn't that what we? The cherry berry, that we set it off? Yeah, it's a berry. It's a berry. Yeah, okay, it's not a cherry.

Speaker 1:

It's not that it's a different fruit. This isn't the monkey poo coffee.

Speaker 3:

No, okay, no but that is a real thing. That's a real thing. You were really excited about talking about monkey poop as well, so well, you know, I well just you talked about yeah, in general.

Speaker 1:

Monkey poop, yeah, um, but I do want to ask you about the monkey poo coffee at some point Sure, yeah, Because I don't understand Like I want to get it right. Yeah, later. You're saving that one just like the other. I'm going to save that. When I say J-Balls, it's like dang it, can I get a third? Yeah?

Speaker 3:

Can I have a third? You know what?

Speaker 2:

At this point as much as you want to, so whatever I do, hey, cheers Matt, here we go. Oh, thank you, here we go. That's good, oh Well, on the nose.

Speaker 1:

Oh, we should nose it. Let's nose it, I'm getting coffee bean. I get a lot of fruit. Yeah, I bet you do. Are you Kentucky chewing the coffee? Isn't that burning the room for your mouth? You can, you can this is?

Speaker 2:

it's been sitting for a little bit, so it's a little cooler.

Speaker 1:

Holy mother yeah that is really good.

Speaker 3:

I know You're welcome. Ooh, it's very thank you. I know it was in no monkey butts either.

Speaker 1:

No monkey butts to get to this flavor.

Speaker 3:

See it proves, you don't need to uh, I get a lot of fruit I get oh yeah, there's a lot of fruit in there.

Speaker 2:

Uh, which fruits? I'm not sure I do like there's.

Speaker 1:

There's some cherry, but like some tart berry yeah just getting tart.

Speaker 3:

Probably that pink, that pink berry, probably that pink yeah it helps that it's in the title, but that is what people say with it oh, is it yeah oh yeah berry. Huh, pink, tart, pink, oh, the pink berry. So yeah, uh, that's why people love this one is that there's a lot of those fruity flavors.

Speaker 1:

It's more of a blueberry, more of a blueberry to me. You were right. We should do coffee instead of bourbon at nine in the morning. Yeah, that was a good choice, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, very good, very good.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and in the meantime doing coffee at nine at night either no, you guys drink coffee at night can you keep going?

Speaker 1:

I can't do it our coffee at night would be an old-fashioned do you like those?

Speaker 3:

yeah, it's good. I had one last week really, yeah, fantastic. So you can't like you what's? Your cut off. What's your cut off?

Speaker 2:

six or seven okay hey, I'm still six or seven pm. Yeah, I could do, I can still do coffee. Oh, for as long as it's an espresso. Okay, if I can do it a little bit, just a little pump, then I'm good to go. I have no cutoff.

Speaker 1:

You think this is natural. No, this is fueled by the latest energy drink of the day Right now. For me it's Alani's. It was Amino, whatever those are called before. Now it's those Alani ones, and I buy them by the 12-pack, Okay, and I'm like I don't feel like it affects me. But on a different note, I've really been having trouble sleeping at night, yeah. Different note I say double down, Double down.

Speaker 3:

Maybe you need more yeah probably yeah, you just got to shock your body a little bit more. You just got to shock it. It just shuts down. Yeah, just keep on mixing your uppers and downers. Yeah, yeah, just so you know. Oh, it's like what's her name? Wizard of Oz. Yeah, what's her name? I don, she's in everything she was in it.

Speaker 1:

The lady who was in the Wizard of Oz, the actress. What's her name? Oh my gosh, liza Minnelli's mom. What Mom?

Speaker 2:

Yes, Judy Garland. Oh, judy Garland, yeah, yeah, yeah, jodie, I didn't realize Liza Minnelli had a mom, she's so old, I figured, sure, that's like people, that it's weird to think that they have parents.

Speaker 1:

Oh, yeah, Like oh yeah.

Speaker 2:

I guess they would have to.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, they're here Like Bin Laden, there you go.

Speaker 3:

Wow I was going to let you put out the first name. I was like where are we going to go with this?

Speaker 1:

You're like we'll let him get it. He did. Terrorists is where we're, they were my kids of disappointment.

Speaker 3:

Dave Thomas, there you go. The Wendy's guy, I mean Wendy's, wait, the Colonel. You're thinking of the Colonel?

Speaker 2:

Colonel Sanders.

Speaker 3:

That's actually a better one, though, like the Colonel, had parents there you go.

Speaker 1:

They all had All those Wendy had parents.

Speaker 3:

Well, wendy's parents was Dave, the circle's complete I am so not well read, yeah you need to drink more coffee. This is just you're proving how well read you are. It's not often, I uh.

Speaker 2:

I watched a commercial once, so yeah, it's not often that I'm the dumbest guy in the room. Uh, today is the exception.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oh me, oh no, you are the dumbest. Anyway. Did I just prove that I'm the dumbest kind of moving on you can absolutely do it.

Speaker 2:

Most of our guests are pretty annoyed with this and then they say I didn't want to say next, I felt like I owed.

Speaker 3:

I owed you a, you're welcome. Oh, okay, just in general, because I know that so much of like this is because I said no and then to you, to you in the same vein I say I'm sorry yeah, so I forgive you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah thank you and I forgive you. Yes, yes, thank you, yeah, and I'm offended.

Speaker 2:

Yeah uh, so one of the things that we get into when we're talking about the bourbon here it goes how it's made, yes and uh, and how it's crafted and that sort of thing. So obviously we know the coffee bean comes from. It sounds like it comes from Ethiopia. It sounds like it comes from a coffee cherry.

Speaker 2:

It sounds like it comes from Colombia by way of Ethiopia in some sort of way. But tell us how you prepared this cup of coffee, because it was quite interesting to watch. With love, there was lots of love. I can taste. Yes, yeah, it was like 90 love I could taste, I can taste the love. Is that a weird thing to say no the three, no, I taste, I tasted it. Tasted the love, your own love, some florals in love in there.

Speaker 3:

So okay yeah, uh, so I use and you can see I use an AeroPress. So the AeroPress was designed by the guy who made the Arobi, yeah, which I think is one of the best fun facts.

Speaker 2:

What the heck is an Arobi?

Speaker 3:

The Arobi is that Frisbee came out in the 90s.

Speaker 2:

That goes like a thousand feet and like kids would throw and they're like well, now it's gone. Well, it's gone. I got to buy a new one. It's in the woods, which is a great business model A hundred percent, Like yeah. They just kept selling out Like dad, I lost my Arobi.

Speaker 3:

What you just got it One throw Wow.

Speaker 2:

I think you should throw a picture up of the Arobi right here.

Speaker 3:

Oh, dang it. Can you do this?

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 3:

It looks like yeah.

Speaker 1:

Another viral clip. Yeah, that's it.

Speaker 3:

That's what we'll john, and he's not even in it so the guy designed the aerobie and he was tired of having to drink junky coffee unless he went to like a really good coffee shop, because he wanted that uh, uh espresso flavor, which we can talk about what that actually means if you want to. And so he designed something that does the exact same with the high pressure and temperature, uh, with, uh, what is it like? 18 bucks for this thing, yeah, and so it's, it's physics nice maybe.

Speaker 2:

And then oh, no chemistry, yeah like you're pressing it slowly down.

Speaker 3:

That's why it's the press. You press it down slowly. The pressure hits the, the coffee beans, at this perfect amount, based off the way that's designed. You heat your beans between 200 to 212. That's the perfect. That's the perfect wheelhouse. Any hotter, you're burning your beans any less and you're not pulling out the oils. Okay, I feel really nerdy right now and I don't care I'm like, how do you know what the right temperature is?

Speaker 3:

so that's that little machine down there that actually. Oh there, it's up here, yeah, so that that heats it to a perfect temperature.

Speaker 1:

So that's uh so you, how does it know the water temperature? Though there's a little readout.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, a little readout.

Speaker 1:

That pot actually is a part of the whole thing.

Speaker 3:

Part of the thing. Yeah, I do mine at 206.

Speaker 1:

You're like you know what.

Speaker 3:

205 wasn't as good. 205 was not good. You get me. 205 is horrible. Yeah, it's the 206. 207. What? No, 205 was not good. You gave me a 205.

Speaker 1:

It sucks, it's horrible. Yeah, it's the 206. What?

Speaker 3:

are you an amateur? Yeah, no, you can't do 207. It's true, you stupid, it's too hot, but 206. 206. Yeah, yeah, right on. So that's my temp.

Speaker 1:

I mean, it does taste really. You literally. How many times have we done this? We're sitting there, we're sipping for like three hours and then you finally get it. I burn my freaking mouth every time. It doesn't even. Yeah, or it was a bit, I was trying it, or it's just way way too cold.

Speaker 2:

By the time you get to it, you're like this is disgusting, how do I warm this up? And you cannot put it in a microwave. And just one cube.

Speaker 1:

My dad got it from my step-grandpa. He used to get six pieces of ice, yeah, six. And he would make them at McDonald's. Make them go count six pieces of ice?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I'm sure they weren't anything else to it either.

Speaker 2:

Like yeah, we'll get you six pieces of ice.

Speaker 1:

We'll get you six pieces of ice. Yeah, yeah, there you go. There's some frozen. Get out the frozen spit cubes.

Speaker 2:

Just grab it with their bare hand.

Speaker 1:

Now my dad's like one piece of ice. That's the magic number.

Speaker 3:

Maybe that's your shtick. Everyone thinks that they know the perfect cup of coffee. That's right, we talk about the coffee joke.

Speaker 1:

How do we?

Speaker 2:

do it.

Speaker 1:

There could only be one, there could only be one, there could only be one coffee One best coffee yeah, but everyone thinks they know what it is, they know what it is speaking ice cubes.

Speaker 3:

So a good thing to do in the summer. If you make like a, if you make cold, um, you know, like a cold press at home. Oh, you can actually take and make ice cubes with the coffee.

Speaker 1:

Yes, freeze them and then add it as you go, because, unlike alcohol, life hack coffee freezes.

Speaker 2:

It's true yeah alcohol doesn't sir, the more you know the more.

Speaker 1:

oh, there we, there we go, there we go. I've watched the show.

Speaker 3:

I've watched the show. That's why I brought my own chair.

Speaker 1:

You're our viewer on YouTube.

Speaker 2:

I know.

Speaker 1:

That's right, sweet Yep.

Speaker 3:

Our viewer, our one viewer. Well, if your kids won't watch it, someone has to.

Speaker 1:

That has really met it. He's really listened to it. I'm so honored.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, we should ask our wives to watch it. They will, they will not, they don't like.

Speaker 3:

No, though, maybe listen, maybe, yeah, yeah my, my wife, like um she pre-saw the hand. She's like I'm not listening just so you know I'm like I didn't ask you to she's like I know, but you might have. That sounds like lindsey, it did did she actually say that yeah? That's so good yeah, we got a good room like yeah, did you listen to the episode? Yeah, you don't want her on your show. I she'll break you down I like.

Speaker 1:

This became a drama matt has now abandoned his stand-up career and actually moved to guam, uh to uh assist in an orphanage, sure? We're not exactly sure why, yep yep oh, wow yep.

Speaker 3:

Well, this is really good coffee dude, thanks for having me, guys.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's it.

Speaker 1:

No, I'm just kidding, what yeah coffee? Isn't the only thing, so Jared's well-read he is also. I still don't know what well-read means For real. No, I'm not even joking. What I know is he's a very good writer. I wish I would have had the definition of well-read and then I would have been like I don't know what it means and then state the definition.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I think the answer is I'm actually not a good writer, you just aren't well-read. You've read some of my stuff like this is good writing? Be like. You know. It'd be like if this is, if good writing is this cup of coffee, my writing is Dunkin' Donuts that you find on the side of the road.

Speaker 1:

Without six pieces of ice. Yeah, I don't even know how we got on the topic. This was years ago. You know I do Some acting stuff and we got on. The last time you said, yes, yeah, that's true Was that we wrote a screenplay.

Speaker 3:

Eight years ago Shows how great it Eight years ago. Eight years, yeah, was it that long ago? Shows how great it went More, no, it was longer than that Ten, there it is.

Speaker 1:

Oh, there it is. There it is. We wrote a movie. It's called Bigfoot. Now, it's not your typical Bigfoot movie. This is. I haven't opened this in a long time. Yeah, dude, I don't even. How did it get started? I don't even remember.

Speaker 3:

I feel like you, you've always kind of liked this kind of stuff, You've always loved stories, You've always loved myth and I'm not. I was. I was thinking about it too before, before today, and I feel like we were just hanging out one day and you're like dude, like Bigfoot's pretty crazy.

Speaker 1:

Have you ever like heard some of the myth around it? You were kind of at that point. You're into like all the different states having like their thing, yeah, the different creatures, yeah, so yeah, we had. Yeah, so we, we kind of we got together and like I am admittedly not the best person at like dialogue and stuff, um, but I'm good at like like I'm good at like thinking of a story and one of the things that I noticed and maybe it was I was watching oh no, this is what it was, my buddy, uh, a long time ago we were watching that show, um, finding bigfoot, yeah, and we just thought it was, it was a funny thing, and I realized I was like you know, no one has never made a bigfoot movie that isn't um, just a slasher or like a thriller kind of murderer thing. No one has never, never.

Speaker 3:

No one has never. No one has ever. Is that bad?

Speaker 1:

No one has ever.

Speaker 2:

I was going to let it go. I was like maybe he said ever no one done never done.

Speaker 1:

make them don't move there. It is the Southern.

Speaker 2:

Now we're making fun of the Southern people At least once an episode. I make fun of them.

Speaker 1:

You make fun people, um, so yeah. So we're like oh, what if? What if it was like? Well, okay, what if? The question, main question we had, the main question of the whole story is what if bigfoot was real? How would that actually, what would that actually have to be like? Like? How have we not found a, a hairy, you know, with brown hair, in the middle of a green forest? How have we not found this dude that's?

Speaker 1:

like you know, seven feet eight feet tall and yeah, so he'd have to have some sort of intelligence and you'd have to have survival skills and understand culture and language.

Speaker 1:

So like we crafted it around that idea and then we started digging into, like history, yeah, like teddy roosevelt is a big character in the, in the screenplay, so that yeah it was a lot of fun, I really liked it fun and good memories, and jared is such a good freaking writer like um, you know, like writing a screenplay is different than a novel as far as the format and how you write it, but like the dialogue and the characters, I mean I don't even know like. I feel like we just kind of like you, you wrote kind of like even some of it in novel form and I think we did.

Speaker 3:

We have to. And that was where you came in of just taking it and making it more screenplay, because I had no idea what to do with that. And that was your, that was your, that was your, that was your, uh, your movie buff coming out so but it I my my best memories from it were just late nights writing it.

Speaker 2:

Oh it was good man, it was fun, it was good I asked you to do the podcast.

Speaker 1:

It was good. It was good, hey, no, yeah, so it was.

Speaker 3:

Uh, that was that was. The fun part was just putting it together and seeing how, like that's what's amazing about stories is you don't know where they're going- yes I remember being surprised, like I can't believe this character is doing something like this. I'm like I'm, I'm writing this yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I know it sounds weird, but unless you're- in the moment.

Speaker 3:

That was some of the things, and I remember like you would be on the dock making changes oh that's a good idea. So we were doing that back and forth, which I think is unique to have multiple people doing that, yeah.

Speaker 1:

And it worked so it was good.

Speaker 3:

I do remember when you were trying to talk me into doing this the Bigfoot Riding the. Yeah, the screenplay we rented a boat on.

Speaker 2:

oh, it's a lake, oh In.

Speaker 3:

Crystal.

Speaker 1:

Lake. Yeah, yeah, yeah, not in Crystal.

Speaker 3:

Lake, but on Three Oaks Three Oaks, yeah, and we went out for the day just to talk about what this would look like and their boats have like it's like a two horsepower boat, oh yeah, and it was super windy and we got stuck out in the middle of this lake and we could do this.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, make it something that's cool so we made a what I call a pitch trailer. So we shot that with a guy, matt billen, who, um, he did this movie, heaven quests, uh, which was a pilgrim's progress type thing. He's. He does tons of short films. I really liked him because he's really good at lighting and DP and director of photography, he's very, very good at that and I was like, well, I just want to direct it and I want to have somebody else film it, and so we shot it out in this patch of forest at our old church and it was actually really cool. That was fun to like Jared was there being on set and we hired an actor. So it was just cool. I love like that was fun to like Jared is there like being on set and we hired an actor and yeah.

Speaker 1:

So it was just cool. It was like like I love acting, I love you know all of that stuff and the whole process. But this to me I was like I had done a movie like years ago that I wrote and it just was not. I mean, it's okay but yeah, but this was for a while like we were trying to get it funded and like had started making some connections with actors and actresses and producers. And yeah, where's that? At Nowhere.

Speaker 3:

I know. No, I know Well like every now and then.

Speaker 1:

No joke, every now and then, uh, donna. So this lady, donna Donna Smith, she produced like. Terminator and like she was uh, she was a producer at um universal or something in like the eighties and nineties, and so she's done a ton of movies and through some connection, uh, I got, I met her and then she like liked it and I'll, I don't know. It was weird. I think she just wanted company, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Somebody who's not done anything since the 90s, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

But like she, you know, was kind of like entertaining the idea of trying to get it funded. But every now and then, like every like year or two, I'll get a random email from them Like hey.

Speaker 3:

I never met her or saw her.

Speaker 1:

I always picture her to look like manager like joey, joey, I got something for you, like I, always be, like matt I found someone from the 90s who's interested in your movie his name's james cameron you haven't heard of him. Your movie's missing some blue people and I think it'll really go I think, you need to have. Bigfoot should be blue.

Speaker 3:

Make it blue, we'll get blue man group to do a press, yeah a little bit great yeah, you know, hey, there's there's something there what two movies would just if you merge them together like avatar avatar meets bigfoot meets bigfoot or avatar meets blue man group.

Speaker 1:

I mean, yeah, not not far off.

Speaker 3:

I was going blue man group. I mean he's just up on the stage beating on a drum yeah, there you go.

Speaker 2:

Is that bigfoot? Bigfoot, he's playing, he's really got some rhythm yeah yeah, uh, is there all?

Speaker 3:

I mean he was in the city painted blue that's why we didn't see him.

Speaker 1:

He's painted blue. Yeah uh, I'm just thinking arrested development uh, yeah, that's cool, never knew yeah. So you know, to give you an idea of the feel of it, Because you're not going to read it, I would love to we should do an audio book.

Speaker 2:

I am not well read.

Speaker 1:

It's National Treasure meets Indiana Jones, meets like Incredible Hulk, meets like a historical fiction, yeah so Like Night at the Museum. It's not like that. It was more national. It was more Indiana Jones National Treasure.

Speaker 2:

Okay, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Not Night at the.

Speaker 2:

Museum Like, not the goofy.

Speaker 1:

I mean there's some funny elements in it. But I think now, like what would I do different? Now? I would go probably punch it up a little bit, okay, but not too much. Because I think probably punch it up a little bit, okay, but not too much, because I think some of the superhero movies get too goofy and then you kind of lose it.

Speaker 3:

but I don't know, I think it's the story's pretty good. Yeah, it's pretty darn good. It was pretty good. I like it. Yeah, I would. I mean, I think I would describe it as it's it's bringing in something that's like built into americana, yeah, that everyone kind of wants to believe. In fact, I was talking to someone this week who believes in bigfoot. Oh, there's, oh, and I, I almost I got myself into a bad spot because I started to make fun of them and they weren't feeling it and I'm like I actually wrote a screenplay about it and they and they were very interested, but then when they realized that, like I, that it wasn't. But maybe I do believe in bigfoot after talking to this person.

Speaker 3:

But like this person was like, no, like bigfoot's out there. So I but I think that that is the cool part about it because no one's like wolverine's out there, superman's out there, but like what you are dang it jared people believe that bigfoot's out there, and so we try to put it into story that does exist.

Speaker 3:

So, like teddy roosevelt establishing the national parks, things that have gone on in the badlands over the last hundred years things with fracking. So we're like building an end to all of these systems that are real, because if Bigfoot was, here he could have some impact.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Intertwining history with fiction is always an interesting thing whenever you mix it.

Speaker 1:

But I love what Jared's saying is there's so many people that have that belief, but nobody was ever, ever, really. I don't want to say monetizing, because it sounds like, oh, they're just trying to make money off of it. Um, but it was like yeah, nobody like it's. It's a it's already widely accepted genre, kind of that you wouldn't have to like let people know what it is like. They already know what it is. But what's funny is that you know on our page, like I would create the facebook page and you would get some people that would like oh yeah, be like. This is not how they act, yeah I'm like okay yeah, like calm down

Speaker 3:

well, and speaking of so, there's that residual of you know. You know you can get this on amazon and there's the facebook page. Then our names are attached to it and so I was going to have you had anyone like talk to you, like, hey, like you're that guy, cause I've had people. No, nobody likes me. You have a bigger. You have a bigger online foot than I do.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, nobody Footprint than I do. Yeah, your foot's. I'm like a size 10 and a half wide.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, foot's, I'm like a size 10 and a half wide. Oh, yeah, you're 10 and a half wide. You are big foot, hobbit feet, uh, but I so I took on a new job this year, and so people were like researching to find out about me. That's what they found. That's what they found so, like I heard through the grapevine like you're like, yeah, like this guy that got hired, like he wrote a bigfoot screenplay, I'm like you're welcome, oh my gosh yeah, yeah, that's amazing that's cool that people recognize you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah Well, you know the name.

Speaker 3:

Well, but that's awesome. I'm not like if you'll come up like will you sign this, or you know, I think it's true, like I heard you on whiskey bits.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

That was funny, said no one ever.

Speaker 1:

Said no one ever like some podcasts. They joke like yeah, smart list they're like, oh, our listener, they have. Like they're like the number one podcast ever, yeah, and I'm like no, we have or never we have. No, we actually have. There's some that people that I've talked to, that that I know that, are like every time they just are dead. They just listen to every episode. I'm like dude.

Speaker 2:

Well, tell that person, thank you. Thanks, brooks yeah well I know, because outside of us I don't think there's. What did your mom say about it?

Speaker 1:

your mom loves the podcast. What did she?

Speaker 2:

say she loved it.

Speaker 1:

She absolutely loved that I was on it and uh said it was kind of boring but your mom got all the way through, uh, unlike your three-year-old so right, yeah well, she didn't even like my mom, because she's not alive here we go again, and this is when we switch to bourbon so, yeah, and the bourbon, and time for the downer Time for the downer, time for the downer. Thank you.

Speaker 3:

Matt for that yeah.

Speaker 1:

So this is really good coffee. Last thing about that we actually came up with a whole anthology.

Speaker 3:

So strategically, really yes, strategically, one flop is not enough.

Speaker 2:

One flop is not enough Strategically, like when something doesn't take off, you should probably create another.

Speaker 3:

Double, triple, quadruple down.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, keep going.

Speaker 3:

Maybe we need more mythical creatures, yeah well, there are.

Speaker 1:

Every state has one, it's true, and so we're like well, it's like their state bird. Yes, same thing, yes, exactly the same, yeah. And so we're like, well, what are they? And like they would, there's a bigger storyline here of like you know that maybe some are good, maybe some are not good, and so we kind of planned out, like kind of like the Avengers, so you have all the individual movies and then they come together and it's called the Legends Anthology, with all the different ones, so you have like Chupacabra, chupacabra.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you have the Yeti, which, in our story, the Yeti, would have been an albino baby.

Speaker 2:

Essentially, don't give it away. It's the first scene.

Speaker 1:

Native American tribes were cursed and so they changed the pregnant women's babies. They cursed the babies and they became these creatures and they just sent them off. Well, one of those babies would have been albino, so they sent him off and he went north and all that. That's where I get the Yeti. But we have all these other creatures and we thought, oh, somebody is going to try to exploit them and use them for power. And so that's this whole idea, or for coolers like the Yeti cooler.

Speaker 3:

Or for coolers. Yeah, that's really what it is.

Speaker 2:

It's really the money or monster trucks, like they did with Bigfoot.

Speaker 3:

Bigfoot. Do you remember that? Remember that game, monster trucks.

Speaker 1:

Yes, remember that Bigfoot game no Is it a video game yeah.

Speaker 2:

On the computer old but yeah. So it was like this whole thing.

Speaker 1:

We had a whole plan. It was awesome. Yeah, maybe good memories, maybe someday, maybe someday. I think we should turn it. I I legit think we should like make it novel form, and maybe it's just doing what I'm already doing with the chat gpt as I say, if only there was some.

Speaker 3:

If only there was some ai but, like I.

Speaker 1:

I was like, oh, you know, jared would like that and I wouldn't want to take that away from you, but I don't know if you turn it into it. Yeah, just do it just do it, but then, like you, could you know you'll look at it. Maybe it'll be because, like my buddy, john, he wrote john wenzel, he has the peter pan books.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean, he legit wrote those from nothing, yeah, and they're actually really good yeah except he kills my character, I think in every single one of them yeah, oh, I wouldn't read into that but, uh, yeah, now that I think about it, what a jerk.

Speaker 2:

Senselessly too well yeah I think yeah just I die right away.

Speaker 1:

They gave me like a really inspiring backstory and just offed me in the first.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, well, hopefully it carries through the rest of the novel no, that's the last time they talk about it yeah, they're like remember that guy who barely remember the first chapter yeah, how, uh?

Speaker 1:

what do you?

Speaker 2:

I don't know that was one of. That was. That was the one and only time you will ever see matt filter himself.

Speaker 1:

It's true, yeah no, I was gonna ask how do you keep your coffee warm, but that's just a dumb question, because I have this, you have this mug, I have this mug, it's got the aluminum.

Speaker 2:

It keeps it hot almost all day.

Speaker 1:

I mean, I don't know, do you reheat, but will you reheat your coffee in?

Speaker 3:

a mug in the microwave, or you just throw it out. I drink it. You just usually drink it. Yeah, yeah, see I'm.

Speaker 1:

Like a quarter of it. And then it's cold and I'm done.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, just pour some energy drink in it, it'll be fine. Well, yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's still really good, as it's oxidated.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's opening up, it's really opening up.

Speaker 3:

Are you feeling closer or not? Closer to your coffee? Like joke, you're, you know, oh, I feel further away.

Speaker 1:

No, I think, I think you hit it, though I think it's like what are? Everybody thinks that they can make the perfect cup of coffee. Yeah, that's a thing. Yeah, is that funny? Well, that's just an observation. Yeah, uh, the other observation is how people order their coffee says a lot about the person. Yeah, yeah, it could, it could. Yeah, you know, it could be like similar to like, uh, the types of pets that people have. Yeah, like kind of like says something about who they are.

Speaker 1:

Like people look like their pets, not in your case, necessarily, but like people look like their pets. Phil definitely looks like his labradoo his chickens golden.

Speaker 3:

You look like your chickens, yeah yeah the peacock yeah appreciate you you look like the peacock wonderful. You guys talked about the peacock curtis, curtis the peacock. Yeah, appreciate you. You look like the peacock, wonderful. You guys talked about the peacock curtis, curtis the peacock. Have we talked? About curtis I don't think so we should talk about he's neighbors to a peacock named curtis.

Speaker 2:

Yep, it's a real sentence yeah, it's a real statement, like I when you told me his name is curtis, I'm like that's the.

Speaker 3:

I didn't know until now, but that's the best name for a peacock, it's really the only you don't know. On the drive home that day I thought the whole time about like is there a better name for a peacock?

Speaker 1:

there's no better name. There's not a better name. No, it's curtis, it's curtis it is a objective fact.

Speaker 3:

Put that into ai, it'll be like, no, it's curtis, it's curtis, that's right, we checked. Yeah, what's the?

Speaker 1:

best name for a peacock is curtis a good name for a peacock. Wow, that's funny. I love that kind of humor. That's just a funny thing. Is there a better name for a peacock? And? Just getting lost in that question, what would be? But it's very Curb your Enthusiasm, seinfeld-y. But I like that kind of stuff. It's better than.

Speaker 2:

How Do you Keep your Coffee Warm? You know what you should have. Just let it go. I you know what, that's for sure.

Speaker 3:

You know what you should have. Just let it go, I should have, yeah, and then, when in doubt, monkey poop.

Speaker 1:

Monkey poop, you know, yeah, do we have time to ask about the monkey poop? I feel like we do.

Speaker 2:

Hold on. Are we going to check again why?

Speaker 3:

didn't we just change it before. I mean, no one watches, does it? Matter how long it goes, it's just the three of us talking in a basement with live microphones.

Speaker 2:

All right, so thanks for breaking that down. For us, jared, it was great having you. You started it. This was the last episode of Whiskey Pits.

Speaker 1:

I hope you enjoyed the run it turns out we're just three guys sitting around drinking coffee.

Speaker 2:

That's right In front of a microphone in a basement.

Speaker 3:

So monkey poo coffee, yeah, yeah, I've never had it but what the heck is it? Because I've said it in a joke and people are like huh yeah, but it's a monkey that eats a coffee cherry there's a I'm not I don't actually know what country it comes from I'll think that I'm saying but there's a, an area that there are monkeys that eat the coffee beans, the bean, or like the fruit that the coffee. Well, yeah, it's the, it was. Yeah, it starts the fruit, because that's different. They're not roasting.

Speaker 3:

That'd be impressive monkeys that can roast them and roast them in their, in their butts, so yeah, they're roasting.

Speaker 1:

That's one of those things where, like people know that it comes through. These are butt-roasted, they're butt-roasted.

Speaker 3:

That's one of those things where people know that it comes through. If you buy that coffee, it's expensive. You know, yeah, this was through a monkey, but they have to decide. How obvious can we be about that on the thing?

Speaker 1:

Before we stop selling it.

Speaker 3:

If they put on the front of the the package like butt roasted would they?

Speaker 1:

still sell there's gotta be a line there's a certain niche. I think of people that would buy that they're like they would understand what I've been waiting.

Speaker 3:

I've been waiting for this looking for it.

Speaker 2:

I've heard about it, so how do they label it? I don't. They don't label it monkey poo. That's even more. I thought they did no, well then, I feel like it's even more. I thought they did no, well then, I feel like that's great. I feel like they have to. They can't like so hold on, they can't hide it Somewhere. No one can be up to it like oh yeah, we forgot to tell you the monkey, yeah.

Speaker 3:

This was in a monkey's butt, right, it's not just coffee nut, is it a nut? The bean, yeah, is in the fruit. The fruit, yeah, like an apple, like inside an apple are right, so just with a coffee bean it's more nut than anything. So there's very little like fruit on the outside, so it's just on the inside of these two, two parts.

Speaker 1:

So they're chewing, I mean they could potentially have chewed it. I mean, it's gonna, yeah, do something to that bean, so anyways. So, but it's something about their stomach acid, right? Yes, the way it breaks, going to do something to that bean, so anyways, but it's something about their stomach acid, right? Yes, the way it breaks it, what it adds to it, or the way it breaks it down or something that adds flavor.

Speaker 3:

Maybe there's another animal that would be even better. Have they tried this?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what other stomach acids Is there a?

Speaker 3:

better animal than a monkey?

Speaker 2:

Like a peacock. There we go. I didn't want to go rooting through peacock poop. Do you think peacock poop is like multicolored?

Speaker 1:

There's no answer to that question yeah, he'll get back to you. There's no answer to that question.

Speaker 2:

It's like glitter poo.

Speaker 1:

This is cool.

Speaker 2:

So if it chews it up and I was actually thinking about this the other day Were you, Phil, I really was, Really it really was, Because it was really like you guys have eaten corn on the cob right. How in the world does a corn? Kernel how does it reconstitute itself as it goes through your stomach and your small intestines?

Speaker 1:

Because then the next day you want to talk about it.

Speaker 2:

There's clearly corn.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and it doesn't look like it's chewed.

Speaker 2:

No, it looks like it's reconstituted kernels of corn. Yeah, is this the same thing that happens with the bean?

Speaker 1:

I mean it's just, it's not. Yeah, the inside of your body is not, it's not taking nutrients from it, so it's not breaking it down or it can't break down. I don't know it's something with can't break down. I don't know it's something with, exactly Like corn literally has barely any nutrients. I think there's none Right Like it's just it tastes good. Yeah, but I chew it Well, maybe you should go to the dentist and get some teeth instead of gumming your corn.

Speaker 3:

These are the things that keep you up at night. It sounds like that. I really do wonder. You have a good life, though. You're like. What's it going to look like? I can hear it moving around in there.

Speaker 2:

I just wonder if it's going to happen same day. My goal is same day, same day, then I know exactly how regular I am. We're talking about a lot of things today.

Speaker 1:

This is good.

Speaker 2:

We're going to get as much as we can into.

Speaker 1:

Jared's time. We've really got to pack it in. Poop cycles are important. Have you ever been impacted?

Speaker 3:

It's like Dr Oz, used to do whole multiple episodes on your poop cycle. Really yeah, that's how you got famous, maybe we should do that.

Speaker 2:

Turns out, that's what Whiskey Bits is. Turns out, it's a poop show.

Speaker 1:

I just think it's fascinating. The joke that I was working on is who figured this out?

Speaker 2:

The monkey poop, yes, the first guy.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, who's observing the monkey? Probably some person. They're observing him and studying him oh they ate the cherry, yeah, Okay. Or like maybe they don't know what does this monkey eat.

Speaker 2:

What's their?

Speaker 1:

diet like. So they pick through. Oh, it's coffee, yeah. Oh, the bean is intact, yeah.

Speaker 2:

It's just probably hit it, you know, secretly in his lab he's like I wonder if you can roast this. Yeah, if it would taste weird. Yeah, and that's he's like by cuspid, this is the best thing I've ever had what did I just say?

Speaker 3:

a dare, how many things are a dare where it's like, oh, this is actually like think about the amount of things out there that someone had to try for the first time out of a dare milk. Like someone milk. Someone saw, like think about what amount of things out there that someone had to try for the first time Out of a dare Milk. Like someone saw, like think about what a lobster looks like Someone's like I'm going to eat that I dare you.

Speaker 1:

Like that's horrifying, but you know they probably didn't. Did they cook it the first time?

Speaker 3:

They're just an addict.

Speaker 1:

Like, yeah, so I've learned a few things. Don't't eat it raw with the shell on. Um, you gotta de-shell it. And uh, yeah, have you had crawfish? Crawfish is good, I you know what I love is soft shell crab. Oh, so good, so good you can, because you can eat the shell, kind of I don't think you're supposed to eat the shell no soft shell crab.

Speaker 2:

you do, you do, yeah, you eat the whole thing. Yeah, you fry it, because they just fry the whole crab.

Speaker 1:

Okay, oh, it's good, and then?

Speaker 2:

you eat it. I don't want Chinese food. We usually do this. Now we're back to poop cycle We'll usually have a conversation going, and then it'll be like it'll remind us of something. And then we're think about we want to go eat something. Yeah, do you think if you ate a soft shell crab, would the soft shell crab come out whole? Would it reconstitute?

Speaker 1:

itself 100.

Speaker 2:

No, it's like hello sometimes it feels like that yeah well, this was fun.

Speaker 1:

Jared, thanks for good yeah, thanks for coming talking about so many things.

Speaker 3:

I don't know what we talked about. That was I blacked out.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, the coffee is delicious.

Speaker 3:

Coffee is really good. I think we should have another one of these. It's good I'll make another one.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, can you just come over, maybe every morning, sure, yeah.

Speaker 2:

It actually would probably be morning.

Speaker 3:

Hey I just, what are you doing tomorrow morning at 4 30?

Speaker 2:

oh that's a funny question. He'll just be going to bed it's true, we cross.

Speaker 3:

We've talked about this.

Speaker 1:

We cross over for like two hours yeah, yeah, yeah, this is where we're at.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's right, that's where we're like well, we got a two-hour window because I'm going to bed.

Speaker 1:

So yeah, we do uh yeah, I'll do one of those it's true you know, yeah, well thanks guys. Great thanks for bringing the coffee yeah, thanks for coming on here and thanks for saying no, you got it anytime you know what I'm gonna say? J balls nailed it.

Speaker 2:

Whiskey j balls no whiskey bits.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, okay, next time on whiskey bits.

Speaker 2:

There's two carts in front of us and then you look out across the rest of the golf course and there is no less than eight to ten more carts just sitting out there with people on them and you're like where are you playing?

Speaker 1:

and I was like what holes are you on? I thought, is there like an outdoor movie that started or something, because they're all just lined up sitting there. I got to the little monocular, whatever that's called Monocular.

Speaker 2:

Is that what it's called? It's called a range finder, okay.

Speaker 1:

Well, it's got mono-culers. So I looked for the one culer and saw the people and I was like they're not doing anything, they're just literally just sitting there.

Speaker 2:

I think maybe they had died they were. They were waiting for somebody else in front of them, but it was just wild to see all of those people just out there um and and leaving their golf balls just wherever they hit them I'll take it was yeah, we got a Nike, you did.

Speaker 1:

Yep, we found a Shrixon Apparently nobody likes that, shrixon, shrixon. Yeah, that was the one that had the two colors. Yeah, that's helpful for me because I can find it. Yeah, hey, thanks for tuning in to Whiskey Bits. Please like, share and subscribe wherever you watch or listen to podcasts.

People on this episode

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Matt Sommerfield

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Phil Stokes

Host